A Conversation I need to Continue with My Mother-in-law.
Discussion so far:
"Have you made plans for Christmas?"
Judy: "What do you mean?" Clearly, I mean have you made plans for Christmas?
"I would like to be home on Christmas Eve." Unsaid: we've gone to your house on Christmas eve for seventeen years and I would like to be home for this one.
"I just thought we would do what we always do."
So I have to be clearer. "Could we do it earlier? Like noon?" Unsaid: no one has a job to work around so who cares when we do this?
"Well, it's not like you really celebrate Christmas."
Unsaid: You've done a great job of getting us all together to sit around and eat and then eat some more. And the flurry of phone calls making sure everyone is buying things exclusively from other's lists is truly inspired. In fact, so well done gifts are often duplicated. But I want my kids to be able to attend and unless we do it earlier, they cannot.
Her response is her world famous "I'll think about it." She doesn't ask why I want the change or what time I'd like to see it scheduled. Nine days later she is still "thinking about it." Or so I guess, since I haven't heard any differently. At this point, I feel the need to send her an email. Actually open Word first and choose my words carefully. And, it should be obvious to even the casual reader, this is something I just don't do.
But just now it occurs to me to let it go. If she can get those ham roll-ups on the table by noon - great. If not, I will spend the evening at my sister's. A perfect win-win.





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